Romance in Recovery: Start With a Plant RecoveryBy PromisesAugust 15, 2016Active addicts and alcoholics typically don’t enjoy being told what they can or can’t do. The reason for this is simple: they’re usually being asked to do the No. 1 thing they don’t want to do: stop drinking or using. It leaves the addict with an automatic bristling when it comes to authority figures. So…
To Tell or Not to Tell a Date About Your Borderline Personality Disorder Borderline PersonalityBy PromisesAugust 29, 2014When Calista’s friend recently set her up on a blind date, she prepared with the usual amount of nervousness and trepidation. Would he like her? Would she like him? If she did like him (and he liked her), how soon would be too soon to tell him about her mental illness? Calista has borderline personality…
The Female Love-Avoidant: Becoming Real, Becoming Connected Sex AddictionBy PromisesJuly 3, 2013Every relationship is the same. In the beginning, she is so charming, so engaged. It’s as if no one else in the world exists for her except the person to whom she’s attaching romantically. She’s lit up. Then a little time goes by—only a little—and she begins to feel far away. Her silences begin to…
Dating after Recovery RecoveryBy PromisesJuly 2, 2013Relationships and addiction make for a tumultuous mix. You may have had a husband or a boyfriend during your addiction, but your disease likely damaged that relationship beyond repair. If you were single throughout your addiction, it was probably difficult for you to form any meaningful relationships. Addiction tends to dominate your life and force…
Were You the Family Hero? The Scapegoat? Here’s How to Get Past Our Childhood Roles Personal ResourcesBy PromisesJune 30, 2013My sister was the pretty one; I was the smart one. What I saw in the mirror or what she saw on her report card counted for less than what our families believed and how we were treated. What was expected of us as children led to what we expected from ourselves as we grew…
How Childhood Pain Leads to Relationship Trauma in Adulthood PTSD & TraumaBy PromisesApril 10, 2013People with a history of childhood trauma often carry those issues unconsciously forward into adult relationships. A pattern of childhood neglect, emotional or physical abuse, or a story involving sexual molestation or rape creates difficulties for adults as they attempt to make long-term bonds in committed relationships. It is not uncommon to find such an…
Protecting Relationships from the Strain of Depression DepressionBy PromisesJanuary 2, 2013According to statistics, nearly 15 million adults in the U.S. struggle with depression. While that number alone is staggering, it doesn’t even tell us half the story when it comes to the condition’s actual impact. You see, the depression that directly afflicts millions also has a significant effect on those around them – their spouses,…