“What 5 Years Feels Like” – Alumni Blog Post
On March 27, 2012 I celebrated 5 years of recovery. I was addicted to drugs, I was addicted to alcohol and couldn’t stand to take another drink but couldn’t live without it. I showed up at Sundance’s door step alone. Everything was gone, I had no job, my house was in foreclosure, the power was turned off and my family was gone. Everything that I worked so hard for in my life had disappeared. What happened to me? Why me?
I walked in full of fear and anger but with a beautiful gift. The gift of desperation. For me, to drink is to die. I know that today. I stayed in treatment for 45 days, continued one-on-one counseling and worked the 12 steps. I found a fellowship of addicts and alcoholics that I could relate to. I found freedom in the 12 steps and I slowly started to recover. I had to look at my past, my wreckage and see my part in it. Then my counselor and my sponsor helped guide me in the amends process. What a freedom I have today. The beautiful thing is that life has not been easy the last 5 years but I don’t have to drink over it. Every morning I wake up sober I have a clean slate – to write the next 24 hours – whatever that may be – I can write good or I can write bad – I have that choice today.
And today I have a life that I never could have imagined. I got married in sobriety, I have rebuilt my relationships with my family and I get to sponsor other women new to recovery. I have been blessed to be able to open sober living homes in Scottsdale. I help the newcomer every day. That has kept me sober! Today I have an obligation to give away what was freely given to me – the gift of sobriety. If you are struggling in sobriety – get out of yourself and help someone. I promise you will feel better.
As I reflect over the last 5 years and how desperate I was when my journey started – I kept thinking, Why me? And today I think, Well, why not?
Michelle S. > Michelle’s Sober Living