Codependency Treatment at Promises
There are a number of definitions of codependency. Some define it as a dysfunctional relationship with the self that is characterized by living through or for another, attempting to control others, blaming others, a sense of victimization, trying to fix others, or intense anxiety around intimacy.
Codependency is also considered to be a psychological condition in which one person exhibits too much (and often inappropriate) caring for other people’s problems. The inability to take one’s focus off the needs of another may be rooted in the sincere desire to protect and heal the other person. But it can become an intense, obsessive and excessive focus that can have negative effects on your health. This level of codependency is best addressed in residential mental health treatment.
People with codependency addiction may have issues with substance abuse or other destructive behaviors that would benefit from residential drug rehab. At Promises Treatment Centers, residential codependency treatment addresses the deep underlying issues and emotional wounds that sometimes fuel codependent behaviors. Our medical and behavioral health experts craft a treatment plan that tackles all co-occurring disorders so clients can heal fully. Clients develop resilience, self-confidence and healthy coping skills and learn what healthy relationships look like.
According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse, codependency is when another individual, typically an addict’s spouse or family member, feels controlled by the addict’s behavior. Some codependents are adult children of alcoholics or addicts. Their codependent behavior is the result of growing up in a dysfunctional environment. NIDA further states that enabling behavior is characterized by the codependent encouraging the addict to continue abusing substances, indirectly or directly.
However, codependency does not necessarily occur around addiction. Codependency can be a pattern of relating to people or a way of existing in a romantic relationship. A central feature of codependency is an unhealthy dependence on relationships, usually in an attempt to avoid feelings of abandonment.
Symptoms of codependency include:
- Controlling behavior
- Mistrust of others
- Avoidance of feelings
- Constantly seeking approval
- Low self-esteem
- Fear of abandonment
- Feeling responsible for others’ actions
- Avoidance of other relationships
- Excessive caretaking behavior
- Inability to see alternatives
- Hypervigilance, a heightened awareness of potential threat or danger
Codependency and Early Trauma
People with codependency issues tend to sacrifice their needs for the needs of others. They often focus intently on the needs and actions of others and make life decisions based on serving others in a way that prevents both parties from growing. A codependent relationship can be with a parent, child, spouse or friend, or people at work or in other social circles.
Many codependents have attachment injury or intimacy disorders, were victims of childhood trauma due to sexual or domestic abuse, had parents or siblings with addictions or have addictions of their own. For example, a child with an alcoholic father could grow up to be attracted to partners who drink excessively. Some people have had extreme losses they’ve never worked through, such as loss of a parent as a young child or loss of a child. When these issues begin interfering with daily activities, outpatient therapy may not be enough and residential codependency treatment centers should be considered.
Negative Patterns in Codependent People
A codependent person who is focused on the needs of others, and trying to control others by taking care of their needs, often neglects themselves to the detriment of their own health and well-being. They often derive self-esteem in their caring for others. They come to identify strongly as having responsibility for the other person or managing that person’s emotions, thoughts and actions. This keeps their nervous system in a state of high alert, waiting for the worst to happen.
In the process, codependent people often develop negative emotional patterns, such as catastrophizing or always expecting the worst to happen. They also take things personally, whether it is something someone says or an action that is clearly out of their control. For example, a codependent mother trying to stop her 20-year-old son from drinking will do everything possible to dissuade him but will also pick her child up from a bar, drunk, and tuck him into bed. Or she may drive her child to get drugs thinking as long as they are taken in the house she can protect her child. This puts undue strain on the codependent person and enables the young person’s destructive behaviors.
Codependent people also ruminate about the people in their lives, and may spend every waking moment worrying about a loved one. They are, as a result, consumed by overwhelming anxiety.
Codependency and Addiction
While a person addicted to drugs or alcohol is completing treatment and/or is in recovery, often the partner left behind, the codependent, receives no help. This is difficult, not only for the addict, but also the codependent. Without assistance and support or some kind of professional codependency treatment, the codependent cannot begin to change their distorted way of thinking. The relationship cannot be sustained on a healthy level.
Codependency recovery is a process, just as overcoming addiction is a process. The codependent person wades through denial, survival tactics and unhealthy coping mechanisms developed over time. Codependents often have an addiction to one or more substances or behaviors. These are often means of coping with pressures and stresses of living with an addict. Sorting through all this takes time. Professional help such as time in codependency treatment centers or intensive outpatient therapy with a therapist is often required to recover. Codependents Anonymous (CoDA), a 12-step group for individuals struggling with codependency, can also be helpful.
Looking for Codependency Treatment?
Break free from codependency. We can help you develop resiliency and strength. You’ll receive expert mental health treatment in a safe, accepting environment with peers who share similar struggles. Call us today for a free, confidential consultation: 844-876-5568
To learn more about Codependency Treatment, call 844-876-5568